Ten Years!

It's hard to believe that it's been 10 years ago today that I had the surgery to repair my broken heart. It's been a short time span, but lots going on in that little bit of time. Some good, some not so good. I'm glad to still be here, but it hasn't been without some heartache along the way. I lost my Mom, my siblings have been a royal pain in the ass and the winters are getting longer and longer every year. But, I have my health, a wife that tolerates me, kids that love me, and a granddaughter that brings me great amounts of joy every day. We just came back from one of the all-time best vacations ever. I miss my daughter and it was great to be able to spend some time with her, and taking the graddaughter to see her Mom was the icing on an already great cake. The older I get the more I realize how important my family is. Time is spinning faster all the time. Now that both of my parents are gone I feel it even more. Someday I will be just a memory to my kids, and I want it to be a good memory. I'm going to hope they remember how much I loved and supported them and let them grow to be the great people they have become. I'm pretty proud of them. Anyway, here's to the next 10 years. I'm going to do my best to stick around. Hopefully I can get out of these never-ending winter blues.

I'm having a hard time today and this post goes out to my daughter. She's had the most horrible luck with a medical condition since pretty much the day she was born. Surgery after surgery after surgery, and yet she still manages to stay upbeat and plugs on...most of the time.

Most people have no idea what it's like to go day to day walking and working and doing whatever. You just do what you do and you don't give much thought as to how you get there. Imagine that suddenly you find yourself completely immobile and you can't even do the most basic tasks like fixing something to eat, or showering, or even worse-going to the bathroom without asking for help. This is her day right now. Oh it will get better, and we hope it will stay that way. But for now, it's frustrating for her and it upsets me as well because I'm too far away to be helpful to her. She's been through it before more times than I can remember, but I suffer right along with her from here and I hate it.

So, I just wanted to say-be grateful for your health and don't take the everyday for granted. Hopefully you won't ever find yourself in this position, but if you do, I hope you can be as brave as she is. Her strength is something to behold and I'm proud of her for it.

I was thinking about life today and wondering where my direction is heading. The one thought that I had was that eventually we all reach that point where your life flashes before your eyes. I want to make sure that mine will be worth watching. Is yours?

Much love to you Jess, hang in there. Great things are ahead for you, it all happens in due time.

I wasn't planning on commenting on this, but the recent rash of phone calls and emails I have received has prompted me to say a little something.

First and foremost, my thoughts go out to the family of the guy that died this past weekend in a motorcycle crash. My heart always goes to the families of these people and this particular crash doesn't change that.

Now, I'm getting up on my soap box so bear with me while I get my balance.

This guy was killed while on a "Helmet Protest" ride. He was protesting because the law says he has to wear a motorcycle helmet to protect his head when he rides his motorcycle...and he died. Ironic isn't it? Please understand, I am all for personal choice and taking responsibility for your actions, and this guy was exercising his right of personal choice...but he is now...Dead.

Because this is America, and I consider myself a patriotic person, I will defend the right to be stupid and wrong, that is guaranteed by the constitution and I won't argue with that. However, that being said, riding a motorcycle is a risky task anytime you swing a leg over that saddle, and the idea of not doing whatever you can in any small measure to protect yourself is in my mind idiotic at the least. And then there is the family. Was it their choice to lose a close member of their family? I'm thinking probably not.

I know what head injury looks like up close having lived it for the past 17+ years. Watching someone you love that was a bright light in your own life suddenly become a very dim glow is heartbreaking and every day you wish it were a bad dream and when you wake up it never happened, but day after day it's the same and it will be tomorrow, and the day after, and the day after that.

When I taught people to ride I tried to impress on them the importance of ATTGATT, "All the gear, all the time". Most people got it, some not. But I know I did everything I could to convince them that if it wasn't something they chose to believe from me, at least think about the people that love them and what kind of effect it would have on them if they suddenly find them without you around, or worse, around but not the same person you knew and loved.

I'm sorry, but my sympathy isn't with the guy that crashed...Did I mention that he's dead?

Live your life responsibly, there are others that love and care about you and want you around. Enjoy whatever sport and activity you choose, but do it with love for the people you may leave behind. The comment I keep hearing is, "He died doing what he loved." Really? He loved dying? I think if he had the opportunity to do it over he would probably not choose that.

I'm getting down from my soap box now. I'm angry still, and I realize that I can't save everyone with my talk, but if I can get through to one or two people....I'm happy with that.

What a fantastic, sunny, warm, long weekend it was! I can't remember a 4th of July holiday that was this nice in a really long time, no rain, nice and warm, and...quiet!

I spent time cutting bushes and trimming tree limbs away from my driveway, cooking on the grill, listening to music and really just enjoying some time for quiet reflection. I thought a lot about my family and good friends that are far away and wishing they were closer. I miss spending time with them and wish we could not be so far apart. It's strange how when people are close by you don't really think about it because they are close enough to reach out and touch, but when they go away the distance makes your heart hurt. I think we should find a way to tell those people more often that we miss them even when they are close by.

Physical distance doesn't have to be so far if we make a point out of bringing those we care about closer in our heart.

You know who you are, and know that you are missed and loved.

Well, Happy re-birth to me again! The time and my temper get shorter, and my belt length and bucket list continues to get longer.

It's been quite a year with the usual ups and downs. Some bad things, but mostly good. My health and general attitude seem to be not too bad, but I'm old and cranky so it's hard to tell most of the time. I've watched some more people leave, saw a few come into the world so on balance it was not as bad as some years. I'm going to do my best to stay postive today. I'm going to try to refrain from making too many life changing decisions right now, and in fact from now on this is how I'm going to make all of my new life choices.

It's going to be smooth sailing from now on guys! I hope you enjoy your life too!

It's a little hard to see, but there is a family of foxes living under the building at the back of my Mother's property. I watched them wrestle and run around the other day, and I was reminded of just why I love summer so much here. Warm days, cool nights, animals coming out to stretch after the long winter, and just for the sunshine alone it's worth being alive.

I love the mountain where I grew up. It's changed a lot since I was a kid, but then again so has the rest of the world. Most of the neighbors I remember are gone now, it's hard to imagine that sooner or later it will happen to all of us, but that's the way life goes. We come, we live, we go.

Enjoy it while you can and hopefully the next adventure will be just as spectacular!

So, I guess "No good deed goes unpunished." Not really my motto but it sure fits this week.

We went to my dear old Mom's house to make some adjustments for her so when she comes home from her little vacation in the rehab facility she will be able to get around her house without tripping over stuff. You see, she's 91 years old and almost completely blind, but she wants to live in her own house and do things on her own terms. Her mind is sharp and she's very self-sufficent, so I want her to be able to live in her house for as long as possible if that's what she wants. I'm worried, but I'm not about to tell her how she should live her life. She's always been awesome to me, supportive of anything I've ever tried to do so I feel that I owe her the same courtesy. She wants her dignity and I want for her to have it right to the end of her days.

Anyway, we moved a bunch of stuff around for her and took some things out of the house that she really doesn't need for the moment. It's about a 3 hour drive from our home to hers, so that's a pretty good amount of time to spend in a car. I seem to forget that I'm just not as young as I once was, so the thought of stretching after a long ride before doing any kind of manual labour really doesn't cross my mind. At some point we moved a coffee table from the living room to the garage, and I set it down, turned slightly, and HOLY SWEET MOTHER! My back went *Twang*.....and you guys, the pain was incredible!

When I got up on Saturday I could barely move at all. A hot shower helped, but didn't cure the problem. We went to visit Mom for a few hours, and then...back into the car for that lovely 3 hour ride home. So, Sunday was a wasted Father's Day for me. Down flat most of the day, really unhappy because I had a million things I wanted to get done at home.

This getting old crap is really starting to get ...well, old.
I hope your week is much better.